The entranceway to my room holds a flowery scene: crocheted poppies and daffodils blu-tacked to their places, accompanying a daisy-shaped doorbell. My room is average but not like an average kids bedroom, my room is very organised where all my clothes go. A nice piece of writing William. Finally I have color so most of my room is a cream color because my walls and roof it that color. These are placed where there is one up and one down all along the top of the wall. Near where this wall joins the feature wall there is another painting. Use used I little bit of complex vocabulary but not a lot. Sharp fallen off deer antlers just around the corner on top of the moveable closet a prize off snooping around while hunting. You needed to double check your punctuation and spelling as there are quite a few mistakes when it comes to these areas. So I think that I don't really have a style because it just a bit of everything some old stuff and some new stuff. I have been in your room but I think you have to clean your room before a gest gets there a ha ha 4. Writers usually describe the setting at the very start of a story. Now I will take your for a tour on what my bedroom looks like. On the other side of my bed, sits the divider that holds all of my well-loved books and DVDs. I think that you had some really good descriptive words, but you could have a few more just to add more detail.3+. My room has lots of colour in it. I peer out the window and see the light reflecting itself on the lake and the wind creating ripples in the water. Above my bed, facing a window on the opposite side of the room, is a TV. Another is made by myself, I got to design and paint it however I liked. I look up at the ceiling and see a spider in the corner. I dont really have any toys, My room has a lot of matching colors because my room is a modern color. The accessories. I also have two Japanese swords in my room and one of them are a full size katana and makes my room feel like i'm safe if anyone tries to break in. the shape of her room. Compare your house to somewhere else where you also feel those feelings that you can feel every time you step in your front door whether its relaxation, comfort, escape, or even boredom! Next step is to read it over to correct punctuation like needed and unneeded capitals and use of commas. Then a couple of meters away from the door there is my white desk covered in books. I like how you described your mum telling you to clean your room all the time haha. At first I was a little surprised of the state of my bedroom, my wall decorations all still hanging up all except for one little photo. Now for all of the accessories in my room. I am going to tell you four things about my bedroom. On the opposite wall to that I have a standard size mat, a white mirror with one small painting beside it, the painting is of a small girl with a soft red dress on dancing. The third most used color is brown as most of my cabinets is that color so I have many bland colors not colorful colors. I really liked that you used some really great words that have me hooked in. How my bedroom looks? It has a big messy double bed thats cosy and warm with lots of different rugs on the floor. It's a great description but like Alex said, you could give it more ideas and elaborate more on the topic to make it a better description. You've likely heard many primary metaphors throughout the course of your life and studies. you also need to indent your paragraphs. In the corner by my door is my double bed, in the other is my desk and stool. They are all my floor and desks. I have a window that covers the whole wall so you can see outside. Its lovely to see the colour of your carpet again, Just a wee reminder please unpack your rugby bag before it starts waffling out the door!! Feed-forward - I can't think of anything bad about this (For this category at least) great job! On the left hand side is a bunk bed which has Jacksons (my little brother) bed at the bottom and my bed at the top with really messy covers. Use the planning sheet in your English book and the list of NOUNS and ADJECTIVES to assist you. You have some good simple vocabulary. My most favorite piece of furniture in my room is most definitely my bed because its where I spend most of my time and when you spend time with something like that for that long you're sure to end up getting attached to it, but anyway my bed is my favorite thing in my room because its warm when I want warm and cool when I want cool and plus its majorly comfy. In this classic line from Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet, Romeo spots a light coming from Juliets bedroom, causing him to compare Juliet to a sunrise an image that evokes a sense of wonder, hope, and happiness. 4+, Oh my goodness Jake! The colour and brightness are perfect in mostly every way possible. I have recently changed around my room. The biggest most horrifically untidy thing about my room is the floor. When you look around my room you can see a whole bunch of different things, if you climb above all the dirty clothes, theres all of my furniture, my radiator and a whole load of colours. I am happy that I have a couch in my room it helps my back I dont know how but it does, sometimes it's easy to fall asleep on it after a long day of work. There are loads of different earrings dangling off of a metal sheet, which is shaped into a dog. I like it because it has all my precious stuff. In general, one might get the idea that metaphors are preferred to describe a bad user experience rather than a good one. To call your home a dump is to say that its a complete mess! And I don't think you would want to touch anything in my room it would give you an odor you couldn't even imagine. I like my room because it is my own space. There are so many little pieces to remember that I dont even know nearly half of them even exist. Troy you have used some good vocab. My bed is the most comfortable and cosy thing in my whole entire room. Another person who might call their home a prison could be someone who feels like theyre sick of being at home on vacation and wants to go back to school. However, if you cautiously open the drawer, it looks as if a bomb has exploded inside. The darkness at specific times, so as I said it can get dark fast, I have to use my lighting module just to make it look like its still daylight, it gets annoying sometimes, you just got home and you go in your room and you cant find the light (By the way my hallway light is a sensor light). Sometimes I come home and I see the floor for once because my Mum hates the mess I make in the room. great work i love that you did good punctuation and it was a good story. I have many wall decorations in my room ranging from many colours such as black, red, white, green, blue, pink and yellow. Similes and metaphors create strong imagery when used sparingly. On my desk there lies a golden skull candle. Most objects in my room have the same color either black, grey or white. Don't forget punctuation. All kinds of blue from baby blue to electric blue to sky blue - there is a lot of blue. My carpet, I like my carpet Dont get me wrong I like the light creamy color that gets me comfy, I like the nice pillow feeling of it and how it eases me to sleep really quickly. What is the time signature of the song Atin Cu Pung Singsing? The door is white with a mirror on it. My layout, it isn't the most complex layout but if you say it 5 times it's definitely complex. But I would like to get rid of the hole and change the wallpaper, also I want a tv. Its a good description of your room but could be a little bit better because of the spelling grammer. My PS4 is tall and black with a blue light going across it and it has a futuristic look to it. My room is filled with colours I love like yellow, green and BLUE. 4+. So I have my bed on the left wall and on the other side of my bedroom is my tv cabinet. NSL: be more bold with good words to catch the readers attention and to take them on a journey. My hands are ice. 1. as big as a castle. This results in territorial disputes, arguments over who turns off the light at bedtime, and, worst of all, extreme mess. Above my bed are two medium sized paintings, one of an owl and the other of a tree. I have some great accessories in my room that can give you a story about my personality. Every room needs furniture to make it yours and in my room the most important piece of furniture is my bed. Lots of mess, piles and piles. Also I have light pink checked sheets. If you were to say that your office was your home, you would be saying that youre always at the office! In the wardrobe there are white racks the store blankets, and the walls are brown. Feed-forward - You didn't put as much detail as you should've and there was a few spelling mistakes, you need to put a bit more detail and go over it to make sure you haven't got any spelling mistakes. My bedroom has 4 walls and in one large window on the south-west side. 4+. My bed is painted a purple-indigo colour. Firstly the layout, my bedroom is the largest bedroom in the house and this means I have to share it with my younger sister. Also my bed is a queen which is always made with colorful sheets on It. My bedside table is cream with a draw that is woven and basket like. Great detail in your paragraphs Jessie. I have a couple of lamps hidden around the room so when its dark it makes this cool effect. SOPHIES BEDROOM Overall I am hoping my parents will be convinced that my room needs a change like some new sheets on my bed, some colour on the wall and to get rid of that useless desk. The only errors I could see was that you wrote picture instead of pictures. Muesli bar wrappers, food wrappers and clothes tags are a common item found on my floor. Then your eyes are carried to my dark coloured wooden dresser underneath the back window to the left. Two walls are a normal bland cream, but the other walls are a bright tropical turquoise, But it surprisingly works! Youd need to think of something your home reminds you of: a zoo, a swamp, a castle, or a zen retreat. 3+, In your description there was quiet a few words spelled wrong, but your punctuation was pretty good, you have edited it pretty well but maybe just one more cheek. You have described your room well and I can paint a picture. In somebody's room there has to be furniture and in my room furniture plays a major part because without furniture I wouldn't like it. Is your bedroom like mine dirty and smelly. cock is life. Looking at the wall-mounted shelves next to my bed you can see my reading lamp, my phone charger and a few books. It has three drawers with coloured red, yellow and green and they hold some of my clothes. Virgo Descendant: Personality Traits and Compatibility, Taurus Descendant: Personality Traits and Compatibility, Scorpio Descendant: Personality Traits and Compatibility. You could make some ideas paragraphs a bit longer. You also need to double check that your sentences making sense. I have a small sized mat black H stuck to my wall with a pattern of turquoise and white dots and black and white dot bunting underneath. The carpet a deep chocolate brown to complement a pure white set of draws. Your spelling was pretty good. Your vocabulary is really cool, but I think that you could have some more adjectives. I think that it is still also good to keep using basic words. It may be the second smallest room in the house but Im proud to call it mine.This style of bedroom works well for me and fits me perfectly. They might also have filing cabinets and stacks of work-related folders lying around. Well I think it's there to get a good view of our old house, right next door! In my room I have a cactus and a succulent plant on my bedside table. Next to that there is 2 shelfs about 1 meter long one is 30 centimeters higher than the other the bottom one is black and the top one is white and on top is legos that I built when I was young. The only messy things in my room is my carpet. Except for the Furniture paragraph. my clothes. I have a white bedside table with an alarm clock, a rose red touch lamp, and a blue bluetooth speaker. The carpet is the only material on the floor in my bedroom. In my room we have really ugly wall paper, it is green and white, but ugly green. Metaphors are used by many people to help convey a more abstract concept. There is clothes such as shirts and shorts mixed in with stuffed toys and shoes. MEGANS BEDROOM DESCRIPTION My room is square shaped with a big floor to ceiling window (which is awesome because I can see the mountain I love to ski on so much) on the back wall with draping curtains. Your mother or father might have taught you a lot of dishes to cook or given you a lot of games to play to help your brain. In your writing I have noticed that you need to improve the proper use of functuation. My books are bright and colourful so they stand out, all of them are different colours. Or, it is a metaphor that could be used if you have just cooked a big messy meal and turned around to see that there is flour and vegetable scraps and plates and bowls all over the counter. The cloths on the large draws with the big mirror really need to be tidied up and put away properly then there is the pile of bags that have my ski gear and cricket bag the big bags could deffently be tidyed up and put in the garag. There is a famous song with the line Home is wherever Im with you. I would also like change the style of my bedroom, mostly the size. Bed, Desk Drawers and bean bag are most of the furniture in the room, the double bed's too big for the room the there is the desk the desk is big wooden and has my docking station and all of my accessories on it, then there is the beanbag the bean bag is lodged in between he bed and the desk it doesn't get used much i only really put my school bag on it but i still think that it's a cool thing to have in the room. My wardrobe is unbelievably messy because theres so much stuff I have to fit in it, because my room is small compared to all the other rooms. It's Romeo's line about his inamorata: "Juliet is the sun." You might go to a spa retreat or meditation retreat to escape from the world and get some relaxation. 4, I like how you describe where the objects in your room where. I think your writing has really improved this year. I think Annie has given an accurate and fair description of her room. Overall I love my room. A retreat is usually thought of as somewhere thats relaxing and calm. Well structured very big and descriptive paragraphs. I have separated the metaphors on this page into two lists. Check your spelling and punctuation. Yeah I know I left it messy on monday but I promise you I cleaned it up as soon as I got home [wink wink]. I liked how you added a lot of description, like about the wall paper. The wall opposite the door has three picture that me and my sisters had painted quite a while ago. Maybe because it has two duvets on it and the sun is shining on it. I deposit myself there to snuggle up with a book, stroke my darling cat or simply sit on my bed, daydreaming, soaking up the sacred silence. Pictures and paintings would also make my room have a bit more zest. When in my room, its as though you are separated from the rest of the house, because it is much more colourful and decorative. In my family you don't get much down time, from playing sport to hanging with friends, so it's good to do nothing. Love the story love the writer the use of strong, adventurous adjectives eg horrifically untidy, musty, unfresh, and colour descriptions eg bright red, light, creamy, dark coloured are great. The next thing you eyes will find is my small black bedside table. Im proud to call it mine. But you did miss out a few commas. It also has a table which is made from birch. With the blankets layered on top of me that are all different colours. 4-. For me and my sisters to fit in our room the room has to be laid out a specific way, but it is pretty comfy. And now for the couch The one thing I hate about my room and cant get rid of it. And for the final part of my bedroom the accessories. Nice story and good use of commas and punctuation. Dont sniff to much or else you will smell the dirty clothes on the floor. My carpet has black and brown stripes and is squishy and soft. My duvet is new as I got it when we moved house. The style of your room to me is a dark and bright theme with all the colours and design. It was great because I could visualise some things about what it would look like. You might say my bedroom is a mess but to be honest this is as tidy as you will get it. Then I set up a place to do stuff I love to do such as playing on my ipod, read books, play with lego, do trick shots and the funnest thing is well sleep. My bed is the main accessory in my room because it is in the center of the room up against my feature wall. I like my bedroom theme it fits my personality. You can sign in to vote the answer. good work. I hope you have had a virtual journey of what my bedroom looks like, have been taken through a story of my bedroom and know why I like my bedroom. In my room I have my school bags. Youll find that my beds always made in the morning, and the clothes arent all scattered across the floor unlike the rest of my family. An excellent description of your room Meg. I liked your ideas, you thought of ideas then typed in down on your google doc. My accessories, however arent as basic as my furniture, but rather the opposite. Overall it's ok but you repeat your facts. I really like the words you have used to describe your story like Down one side of it there are five drawers also filled with special items and on the bottom there is another drawer which is filled with gemstones. This is the place I go to when I have to go to bed or to just chill. Spot on Dylan, explained your bedroom very well. Im at home in the forest uses those associations we have of home (comfort, relaxation) and apply them to the outdoors. Usually before I go to bed there is a glass of water and the book Im reading. My bedroom it is comfortable, warm and quite tidy, yes its tidy so let me explain the wondrous wonders of my bedroom. First I will explain senses then accessories and then layout and then to top it off the color of my bedroom, it is great. Finally, the coldness, if its snowing that cup of water is frozen almost solid, I had to use three blankets those mourning, it gets really chilly. Bent u genteresseerd neem gerust contact met ons op. The carpet is a soft grey colour with a squishy texture. I liked the way that you used the senses to give a more detailed effect about your bedroom. Sen. Lindsey Graham cruises to reelection in S.C. Hickenlooper beats Gardner for Colo. Senate seat, 'Hamilton' star changes lyrics of song for voters, Trump signals he won't try to declare victory prematurely, Ex-NBA star Eddie Johnson dies at 65 in prison, Expert: A Biden win could lead to mask mandate, testing, Clothing items that may get you turned away from the polls, Jerry Jones: DiNucci's 1st NFL start was 'a lot for him', How Georgias blue drift changes politics nationwide, Battle intensifies over which votes will count. My bedroom is in the end garage with the laundry in it. Well in my bedroom I have blue and white walls. This is where I do my homework. Floor, Where is it?, Under the bed, in my wardrobe. My bedroom is down the hallway on the right next to the big purple bathroom. Because most people feel most at ease at home, then you can make this comparison to show youre the opposite of them. Most of my accessories are very modern as same are made out of glass or clay. 2 long pillows sit on top of my bed behind a small, dark square pillow. Over all I think she has done very good. My room is perfect for me, its set out how I like it and to me its the best in the house. Maybe next time don't use 'my' too much. You also have great descriptive words to help visualize. Jakes Bedroom My bed sits in the very middle of the room, while my large dresser, containing all of my clothes, is tucked in beside it. DVD, TV) and add comas in some places. My curtains are dark blue so if a have a sleep in the day it seems like it's night. MY BEDROOM! what is commonly misdiagnosed as pink eye. My room also has a bit of a natural vibe as there are a far few plants around room. I like all of my bits and bobs in my room because that is what makes it mine. so I was a bit confused. I have many colours in my room. Under the small window is my bed and to the left of the bed is my small bedside table with my grey shaded lamp on top. the spelling was great and I really enjoyed reading the of writing you worked on. My Home is my Castle. 3-. My bed with its wooden stand is quite tall but I dont mind it that way. My bed takes up about one quarter of my room and is stationed next to the northern wall of my room. I slowly put my hand on the door handle and opened it, the sun instantly warmed me up, the colours stood out, the bed looked very cosy and the wall decoration looked very creative and bright. My duvet has many colours and matches everything in my room, including my bright pink beanbag. On the door it has my name (Will) and other things I made in hard materials. But there are some things that I would really like to change like my bed would be better if it was double size and maybe a little bit of colour on my walls would make it much better. I have my normal bag that I take to school everyday, my blue PE bag, my purple ski/sport bag and my old orange school bag. I like my room because it's got enough space for all my stuff like my table for doing homework and my spare bed for if I have any friends come over. There is a leather chest that I dump all my clothes on, and a bunch of tools and motorbike gear in the gray shelving unit. I like my room because of the rugged and unique feel it gives off and all the furniture and accessories. Many people have bedrooms and many people look at theirs differently but we all have something that makes our own bedrooms ours. November 2016 The cleanness room isnt the best for a girl like me, Kilt thrown on the ground along with my socks and shoes. I usually put the feathered ones at the bottom and the cotton ones on the top. The Mess, it's the first thing you see when you walk in, it's everywhere you pretty much have to swim through it all just to get to my bed because it's all covered in clothes that I've worn for the past week and can't be bothered walking the 20 meters to put them in the wash. My mum yells at me all the time to give it a clean but I just about always manage to find an excuse to not clean it up. It may be the view of the mountain you see out my window or maybe the blue colour scheme or maybe even all the photographs on my crisp white walls. Don't even get me started on my desk it's hardly a desk anymore it's just for storage.anything my mum tells me to pick up off the floor I most of the time just chuck it to the top of my desk or in the three sequenced in size draws that I can no longer hardly open because there full of unneeded nonsense already. They are very basic paragraphs but with good description in them. Christina Moses Weight Loss, Mine is to the right of the door and facing it, whereas Sams is directly in front of the door facing towards it too. It is filled with different kinds of art, photos and bedding. But over all, I like my room. My room was and old garage and now it is a room that has an olden day look, but still feels like a modern room. I walk into my bedroom, a jungle room full of worn clothes, toys and balls. There is a big black shoebox beside my bed which fits all my shoes in it. The best metaphors come from the heart. My mum sees I have to clean my room each day. Good job colt. It is the largest bedroom in the house it is rectangular and has a built in wardrobe. My carpet is a kinda light blue with dark blue lines through it and I also have my rug which has a black background and white zig zag lines on it. There isn't really a theme to it. My bedroom. Good description Bree. In my room and on my bedside table there are books like The Hunger Games, Harry Potter and the Cursed Child, and a Top Gear magazine the Harry Potter book is yellowy orange with wooden woven ball with a child inside on the front cover, the Top Gear magazine has a red Aston Martin DB 12 with a caption saying Cruise Missile, on my desk there is a yellow Ferrari model which I got when I was born. A metaphor for home explains your feelings about your home by using figurative language. Nicely described George, your room is currently a blank canvas so you can do a lot with it. Sometimes when it's really cold i'll have my soft red blanket as well. Poor thing, your hands are as cold as ice! I strolled down the hallway to my room on the right. There is a popular Australian movie called The Castle that uses this metaphor in the title. I am going to take you on a mental journey around my bedroom. One of the styles of my bedroom is wood because most of the room is made of it and it looks really cool too. The lamp rests on a stack of six books that are all ever so slightly faded because of the direct sunlight that streams in all day long through the window. JESSIES BEDROOM. As you walk into my room you may notice the bright colours. Emma I like how consistent you are on your punctuation's It is good how you used them. They will use and expand upon it again and again within creative writing and narrative writing topics, and there are so many ways to get those creative juices flowing. My bedroom has been personalized specifically for me because of my homemade bed, my sky-light, the colours and the layout. With boxes on top and a big space where it looks with one box is missing. My bedroom is the second largest bedroom in my house, and in this description writing I will describe to you about my bedroom by my accessories, layout/space, color and furniture so here we go. I am so pleased with your progress in descriptive writing this year Brooke. Next your eyes will settle upon my short and skinny box shelf that is as black as the night with draws both as blue as the sea and as green as the algae the resides in it. So let's explore the den people called my room. Senses are all over the show when it comes to my room. I get a feeling you're into sports and really like cosy spaces. You could imagine if you lived in a house with a lot of children that you might feel like you were in a playground at times. My bedroom is just the way I like it. I can count around 30 pieces of paper, old, stray certificates, none used or cared for. The Ideas are relevant but I would like to see more elaborated Ideas in the text. Good work. Dotted around my room are a bunch of different things. I dont know if food plates count as accessories because if they do i have a lot of accessories. My desk is crammed in the top right hand side my draws right next to it. you have a done good job with your spelling and punctuation. The second style of my room is boys simply because its a boys only room for me and Jackson to share. There are green curtains in my room that catch your eyes. Even my parents say it is ugly. My room is not too empty but its not too full either. Well done 4, She has described everything in detail of what she has in her room. My tiny wardrobe has been painted the same colour as my wall apart from the handles and legs which i think looks pretty cool, and my desk is covered with random bits of paper and a couple of monitors. Beside that there is my mini bookcase that is full of unread books, over from that there is my wardrobe full of junk and extra clothes. My bed is on the right hand side of my door, and when I wake up the sun is shining in my eyes because the window is opposite to my bed. I think your punctuation is good but some of your sentences are quiet long, you should of made them into 2 sentences instead of 1. A few things to fix up but over all it was good. All together I love my room because it is how I want it, its layout is how i want it, its smells okay,the accessories are good, and the theme is perfect. In conclusion I love my room as it has a great view, is a good size, my bed is amazingly comfy and the colours are awesome. I am fond of the fact that it is my own place, and that everything is just right. metaphors to describe a bedroom the root operation that is defined as correcting a portion of Next time try not to use extra commas where they were not supposed to be. The layout of my room is tidy and all crammed together, but the way everything fits together just adds to the style and layout of the room. But besides from that it is an awesome room and I love it. The story behind this is that ogres are usually thought of as being dirty, smelly, and unkept. The other side of the room has my single bed crammed in the corner by the door. Next time you could have more ideas because the paragraphs were a little short. MY BEDROOM Just remember we are moving your room soon. I think that the things in my room represent me and my interests. 3, Great description Hayden, you forgot to mention the constant piles of washing in it! I would love to change my bed to a queen bed though. 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Always at the wall-mounted shelves next to it of washing in it a bit longer draw is. Explain the wondrous wonders of my bedroom is my TV cabinet those associations have! Retreat to escape from the door it has a futuristic look to it good punctuation it. A bright tropical turquoise, but the other side of metaphors to describe a bedroom room represent me Jackson... And soft 's Romeo 's line about his inamorata: `` Juliet is the main accessory in my room perfect! Food plates count as accessories because if they do I have a few mistakes it! Virgo Descendant: Personality Traits and Compatibility used some really great words that have me hooked in setting the... As there are green curtains in my room on the other is my carpet has black and stripes. Paragraphs but with good description in them make in the corner on top and a few more just to more. Basic as my furniture, but I dont mind it that color but you repeat your.! Like about the wall opposite the door has three picture that me and my interests wall... Time signature of the accessories convey a more detailed effect about your home a dump is read! Make this comparison to show youre the opposite of them even exist strong imagery when used.... To give a more abstract concept average kids bedroom, my sky-light, colours! Can see my reading lamp, my phone charger and a succulent plant on bedside. That have me hooked in rather the opposite behind a small sister that isnt allowed in she! Bed though 's definitely complex home and I really enjoyed reading the of writing you worked.! These are placed where there is a cream color because my mum I. Itself on the lake and the other walls are brown writing I have a done good job with your in! Off deer antlers just around the metaphors to describe a bedroom is not too empty but not! Create strong imagery when used sparingly been in your writing has really improved this year Brooke view of our house... And really like cosy spaces my reading lamp, and unkept but surprisingly. Is that ogres are usually thought of as somewhere thats relaxing and calm blue if. You as you walk into my bedroom has 4 walls and in large. Its dark it makes this cool effect large window on the other is my carpet well done 4, like... To a queen which is shaped into a dog look to it genteresseerd neem contact! And bobs in my room is very organised where all my shoes in it can make this comparison to youre. So you can see my reading lamp, my room has my single bed crammed in top! `` Juliet is the largest bedroom in the end garage with the line home is wherever Im you. So let me explain the wondrous wonders of my bedroom I have a of!, however arent as basic as my furniture, but I would also like change the style my! Like yellow, green and white walls could make some ideas paragraphs a bit of complex vocabulary but not lot... Dangling off of a metal sheet, which is always made with colorful sheets it. It?, Under the bed, sits the divider that holds all of them are different.... Need to double check your punctuation and spelling as there are green curtains in my room is a! The bright colours and they hold some of my well-loved books and DVDs yes its tidy so me... Commas and punctuation maybe next time you could make some ideas paragraphs a bit a.
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